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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Jul 13, 2012 18:05:12 GMT -8
May or may not have been inspired by william stafford >,,>
Today, I heard this: "My water gun is bigger than all your water guns." -Fireman to group of children ogling the firetruck. Truly awesome.
What are some strange things you've heard recently?
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Oct 12, 2012 12:40:54 GMT -8
Revival!
If you take the R from friend, you get fiend.
Also "is he...leaking from somewhere?" "Yep. All down your pants." "Shit!" <-- was actually mucus which is much better
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Post by zoi on Oct 27, 2012 9:25:54 GMT -8
"I saw a chameleon today. So... I guess he wasn't a very good chameleon." - Radio Commercial
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Post by Deleted on Oct 30, 2012 15:07:51 GMT -8
"According to the producers, this play will appeal to a wide audience due to the very strong message at its core. It contains strong language, scenes of a sexual nature and nudity." - Email
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Post by zoi on Oct 31, 2012 19:16:16 GMT -8
"Pinterest; it's like fantasy football for girls." - The local news channel.
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Post by zoi on Nov 1, 2012 10:34:18 GMT -8
"Blind taste tests are stupid because they taste nothing like blind people." - Radio Commercial
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Post by zoi on Nov 1, 2012 21:09:45 GMT -8
"I can always tell when they don't use real dinosaurs in a movie." - Radio Commercial
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Nov 3, 2012 11:19:44 GMT -8
"Oh, cinnamon scented Ponderosa pinecones!" - guy at grocery store
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Post by Deleted on Nov 4, 2012 0:45:10 GMT -8
"Just gonna spend four days getting fat in my room." "Good a time as any to work on push-ups I guess." - Overheard conversation while rushing to gather foodstuffs for the exercise.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 5, 2012 2:27:43 GMT -8
Quote from a man on his second marriage at a party I attended Saturday.
"Ah yes, they say variety is the spice of life. Thought I would enjoy that, but it didn't work out too well for me. See, I thought 'spice' was the plural of spouse."
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Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2012 22:34:20 GMT -8
"No, we're all out of boy toys. We've only got girls left." - someone at work.
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Post by Kuerina Darkblaed on Nov 14, 2012 16:18:36 GMT -8
"Oh, the sun came out just wonderfully!" "Just like it's summer." *old lady chuckling*
-- Two old ladies I passed while walking to the library.
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Post by zoi on Nov 16, 2012 10:37:43 GMT -8
"When you're hungry, the Food Network is like porn." - Jim Gaffigan
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Nov 16, 2012 13:33:18 GMT -8
"I don't wear thongs. Not on my feet not on my butt." - the doctor I work with
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Nov 18, 2012 20:12:25 GMT -8
"'Get you wet? "'Raincoat?' "At least he practices safe song." -- My mother.
Shortly followed by:
"The beibs!"
"...did he just say, the biebs?"
And then, it gets better: *announcement of best male pop vocalist* gaaahnooooo *tv cuts out* haha, even the TV disagrees!
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Nov 20, 2012 13:05:29 GMT -8
"I like how I can be across the street, dry, when its raining pretty hard. Then when I like, step outside to come back, its a TORRENTIAL DOWNPOUR.Then I step inside, and it stops. The fuck?" -- coworker
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Post by Kuerina Darkblaed on Nov 29, 2012 10:57:04 GMT -8
In the words of Si Robertson: "A-S-S-A-Please"
Duck Dynasty makes me almost pee myself every time I watch it..
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Post by Deleted on Dec 4, 2012 5:52:55 GMT -8
"Id rather be robbed than look like a weirdo hahahah"
Someone I have on Facebook on the topic of wearing rucksacks on one's front.
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Dec 6, 2012 16:10:00 GMT -8
"I would like to know what other woman has a soldering iron on her dining table!" - my mother
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Post by zoi on Dec 7, 2012 9:27:17 GMT -8
"I know you're having an affair. I don't blame you; I'm just going to kill you." - Fresh Prince of Bel Air
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Post by Deleted on Dec 17, 2012 12:30:39 GMT -8
"At the end of the first Pikmin game, I went in against the final boss with a full population of Pikmin.
27 left that arena with me. They will live on in Pikmin Valhalla for eternity."
Internet Comment
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Post by Deleted on Dec 26, 2012 15:50:06 GMT -8
"Man, I can't wait to get six pounds of turkey inside me!"
"Do you often fantasize about having six pounds of meat inside you?"
People at work...
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2012 19:31:02 GMT -8
Currently listening to Wolfie argue with her dog.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2012 19:49:49 GMT -8
And now I'm not sure if she is talking to me or the aforementioned dog.
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Post by Kuerina Darkblaed on Dec 31, 2012 23:21:54 GMT -8
"Drop the tacos now!"
- Someone over at my friends house.
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Jan 10, 2013 13:00:32 GMT -8
"Hey, no lollygaggin'."
- my mother who's never seen a video of skyrim in the exact tone the guards use o.o
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Post by Deleted on Jan 11, 2013 20:47:01 GMT -8
"What? ... Are you mocking me?"
"If I was mocking you I'd speak up."
People at work.
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Post by Mhairyn "Aryn" Dirson on Jan 12, 2013 22:53:40 GMT -8
5 second long, very audible fart from the puppy:
"Niiiiice hangtime!" - My mother.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 25, 2013 18:23:00 GMT -8
"Will that be all for today, sir?"
"... I'm a ma'am."
- People at work.
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Post by zoi on Feb 2, 2013 15:28:59 GMT -8
"Many hotdogs are within you." - Commercial
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